Sweet boy, every inch I‘d [blank] in your bed I want to [blank] in your bed seven times. Thigh, gaze, sigh, finger, slap: There is no end to the blanks I’d like to fill in with you. But I’m trying to be good. So we meet for this redundantly termed “bite to eat,” [...]
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MODERN ALICE: Old Flame
Dear Dan, How are you doing? I hope this gets to you. This is the best address I could figure. They weren’t much help on the phone. Last week, we were sitting in the lunchroom at work and the women were each trying to pick the best day they could remember. I could have said [...]
MODERN ALICE: Thin Walls
As I’ve told James, the dog-walker has a crush on the girl in 5C. The girl in 5C doesn’t know this. She’s never heard what I’ve heard: how for weeks he arrived with “Baxter? BAXTER?! Hey there BAXTER!” He’d jiggle the key in 5C’s lock as Baxter cannonballed to the door. I could hear the beagle’s [...]
Modern Alice: Knock Knock
“Give him a chance,” Angie says, watching him go back for another round of Red Stripe. “He’s cute. He’s into you.” “How is he on foreign investment transactions?” I ask. “Because that’s the only thing on my mind this week.” “He IS a foreign investment transaction,” she says. “And you say that every week.” [...]
MODERN ALICE: HOT FOR SANTA
I have the hots for Santa Claus. Here, I’m supposed to clarify–not really Santa, just the local guy who plays him once a year. A coltish college freshman saving up for a new car. Some older man with sad-lidded eyes, alcoholic tendencies, and kids he only sees once a December. But I won’t clarify. That [...]
